Old Man Chispas

Posted by Brandon |

Today was a day that I felt old. Not just a little bit old either, fucking ancient is more like it.

Over the weekend we inherited some couches from a friend. They are really, really nice and we are so happy to have them. But one of the couches is an awfully heavy hide-a-bed from Ikea, and while moving it down the stairs from our friend's apartment, I messed up my back. I worked through the pain though and I think that I may have put it back into place when we carried the damn thing up the stairs to our apartment.

But last night at rugby, it tightened up and started hurting something fierce and all day today it was tight and sore and just a general pain in the ass...er, back. Of course I don't listen to my body and take it easy, I went and took some swings at the batting cage after work and gave myself a big old blister on my hand while aggravating my back. To top it off, I noticed while changing my socks that my feet were really dry and my heal was starting to look kind of nasty.

So I made a trip to Long's Drugs this evening and this is what I purchased...

Now that is some old man shit right there. Gold Bond Foot Cream, blister Band-Aids, icy-hot back pads and Coke Zero. And it could have been worse. They were out of moleskins to protect my hands from blisters in the future and I forgot to get AA batteries.

What the fuck? I'm only 30. It's not like I am, in actuality, ancient. I haven't even become a daddy and yet this is the shopping that I'm doing? Diet soda and Gold Bond?

I've been thinking that tomorrow night I'll go see The Format in concert in LA. Now I'm kind of concerned. One one hand, going to see a cool, young band might make me feel more young and hip. But on the other hand, while growing crankier and crankier with the inevitable wait between bands, I could have my back tighten up while standing in the middle of a bunch of annoying twenty something hipsters. That would make me feel even older than I do today.

Hell, just having that thought run through my head makes me feel old as the hills.

I guess that seals it. I'm Fucking ancient, dude. Fucking. Ancient.

In Other News - We are in need of one more Fantasy Football team. Dutchy hasn't responded (I know she's on vacation, but it didn't sound like she really wanted to play anyway) so her space is up for grabs. If you'd like to play, please leave me a comment or email me at downwithpants@gmail.com


Whit said...

Old gets a bad rap.

Wait until you see the crap you're buying after you have the kid. You'll wish for Gold Bond.

Brandon said...

I actually don't mind being old so much. I'm pretty sure I'm going to enjoy my 30's and 40's quite a bit. But this was kind of a shock to the system. I've never gone to the store and had to buy so many old man things at one time.

Avitable said...

That's why I don't lift anything or do anything remotely active. Keeps me young!

Jesse said...

I actually already feel ancient at concerts. Usually my legs and feet start to stiffen up and hurt after the first band and I'm generally miserable until the end of the show.

Hilly said...

I'm sitting here with two SalonPas patches on my arm and I don't care how old I smell :).

I hope your pain subsides!

Peeved Michelle said...

I have a good massage therapist who will come to your house if you need one.