Another Guy I Might Go Gay For

Posted by Brandon |

Since this seems to be sacrilege week here at Down With Pants! and Dave mentioned "flaming gay" in the context of yesterday's post, I thought why not talk about the man who seems to get all sorts of dudes to go gay for him. That's right! It's Jesus!

When you watch TBN, and I do watch a lot of TBN, you can't help but notice all the guys that are ridiculously gay for Jesus. He is all these guys can talk about. They sound like a gaggle of middle school chicks talking about their latest crush.

Jesus said this and Jesus said that. Jesus died for our sins. I wish Jesus would just swoop down and save me from my wretched life. Isn't Jesus sooooo dreamy. Will you find out if Jesus would go to the Sadies Hawkins dance with me? Me and Jesus are going to marry and live together in a Palestinian free Israel and he will have a great job as king on earth and I'll just sit around the house and praise him and eat Bon Bons.

I might go gay for Jesus. I especially would go gay for Jesus if he was wearing that sweet orange around his head (where the fuck did I find this picture?). But we would have to have an open relationship. Jesus is cute and all, but me and Buddha have a good thing going and you wouldn't believe what Brahma can do with those four heads of his.