Five fucking trick-or-treaters. That's all we had this year. Five. One group of two and another group of three. Between the Harvest Festival at the church down the street and the Mall's Halloween celebration, nobody was left to go door-to-door like in the good old days. It's kind of sad really. Somewhat understandable in this neighborhood, but sad nonetheless.
I have lost all faith in the intelligence of the youth of America. While shopping for cereal last week, I overheard a mom and a daughter trying to decide on their own box of cereal. Mom wanted Cap'n Crunch Peanut Butter Crunch. But the daughter insisted on Reese's Puffs because "it's the real one". What?! Reese's Puffs are not the real one you whipper-snapper. Peanut Butter Crunch is the original. Reese's Puffs, while tasty and less mouth roof destroying, is a rip-off of the Cap'n. Learn the fact before you open your mouth you little brat.
Nonetheless, I bought Reese's Puffs and discovered that the cereal industry is getting into the meme business. 18 Things To Do Before You're 18 is one of the strangest memes I have ever seen. It's ambitious (Play a part in your favorite tv show) but also sets it's sights very low (Meet someone with your own name) for those of us who wasted our teenage years. Anyway, I took the quiz and I failed miserably so I have changed it to 18 Things To Do Before You're 30. Unfortunately, I only have a couple months left to Conquer my biggest fear and to Pass my driving test the first time.
If you would like to take the meme, the unchecked version is available by clicking here. But I warn you, it will make you feel bad about your childhood.
UPDATE: Well, I think the cops came and talked to them, made sure nothing was wrong. It didn't seem like much happened, just a friendly stop to tell them to pipe down. I hope this gave them a good scare so that they get the point that this screaming at all hours has to stop.
I finally decided to call the cops tonight because I heard a lot of banging and I heard her yell "you're the one who just got out of prison after two years for doing heroin." Fucking great. Time to start locking up a little better. I am so ready to move.
The big winner this week was CineRobots, who not only knocked off Witty Team Name 69-62, but a Yahoo scoring change broke the 90-90 tie they had with 2much411foozball last week to give him another win moving him into a tie for fourth place and a possible playoff spot.
The surprise high scorer for the week was the Blogography Hellmonkeys who beat up on The OC Snackiepoos 91-42. Not bad for the lowest scoring team coming into the week.
Here are the week seven results. Leading scorers follow...
johnnyhongkong (2-4-1 - 42 - Tatum Bell - 11 points
CineRobots - (4-3) - 69 - Ben Roethlisberger - 20 points
Witty Team Name (2-5) - 62 - Carson Palmer - 16 points
Cuckoo For Kapgar (5-2) - 52 - Philip Rivers - 13 points
navelgazing ramblers (2-5) - 50 - David Carr - 16 points
Red Zins (3-4) - 51 - Cardinals Defense - 16 points
2much411foozball (3-2-1) - 32 - Eli Manning - 13 points
Blogography Hellmonkeys (2-5) - 91 - Peyton Manning - 30 points
The OC Snackiepoos (2-5) - 42 - Leon Washington - 18 points
Down With Pants! (7-0) - 89 - Donovan McNabb - 21 points
TheDutchFiles (4-3) - 72 - Alge Crumpler - 23 points
So who's next? 2much411foozball, are you up to the challenge? Both teams will be at full strength for the matchup, it should be an interesting game. Culture Kills Lions will try to get back on track against navelgazing ramblers while CineRobots and Cuckoo For Kapgar try to run their winning streaks to three against the Red Zins and The OC Snackiepoos respectively.
2much411foozball vs. Down With Pants!
Red Zins vs. CineRobots
TheDutchFiles vs. Blogography Hellmonkeys
The OC Snackiepoos vs. Cuckoo For Kapgar
Culture Kills Lions vs. navelgazing ramblers
Witty Team Name vs. johnnyhongkong
Bye week teams: Buffalo, Detroit, Miami and Washington
First of all, I watch Veronica Mars, so that's a start. Plus, Veronica continues to quote my favorite movie, The Big Lebowski. Tonight she yelled "Careful, Man there's a beverage here" at Logan while walking across campus. That's the Lebowski quote that graces my VW (which is one hip car)...
Then, at the end of the episode, Logan makes a call to his half-brother...on his HELIO! Hey! That's my phone! I wonder if he has trouble accessing Gmail too. I knew that I liked Logan for a reason other than his brooding.
By the way, how confusing was it to have Logan from Gilmore Girls on with the Veronica Mars Logan tonight? I hate Gilmore Girls Logan, so I couldn't be happier to see VM Logan punch his lights out.
Shit, nevermind. I just talked about the Gilmore Girls. I am no longer a flaming hipster, I'm just plain flaming, which in itself is pretty hip, just not enough to overcome the Gilmore Girls talk.
I had a pretty darn good weekend. I took Friday off with the wife and spent it at Disneyland. The last time we went we upgraded our 2-Day Park Hopper passes to Southern California Annual Passes for a mere four dollars each, so our trip on Friday was completely free. We got to ride the Nightmare Before Christmas Haunted Mansion (awesome!) and the new Pirates of the Caribbean (not too bad) amongst others, but Fridays are awful days to go because at night the place fills up and is nearly impossible to maneuver. We left earlier than planned because we were so worn out by the crowds. It was more crowded than on Christmas Day, which is their busiest day of the year. Oh well, we had a good time anyway.
Saturday I watched college football all day and went to the Ventura College game that evening. Nothing special but nice and relaxing and quiet. Today we went to my company picnic at the Santa Monica Pier and then hung out on the Third Street Promenade before seeing The Nightmare Before Christmas in 3-D (super awesome!). All and all, a solid weekend of fun.
But the fun ends tomorrow and I'm not looking forward to it. For the past two months me and my co-worker have been doing the work of four or more people and I have basically become the manager of our department despite not having attained the title and not getting fairly compensated for the role. Two weeks ago I finally hired a replacement for our customer service rep who left at the same time as my boss and I have been ecstatic ever since to finally get a little help. She was supposed to start on Monday, but on Friday afternoon I found out that she flaked on us and decided not to take the job. Figures. Nothing right has happened to this point, why should it start now?
So instead I have temp coming in on Monday and the search continues. This week we also launch our new order entry system and website, we have period end to manage, we have 25 pallets of holiday stock coming in that we have no room for and whatever other crazy crap the week can throw at the two and a half of us.
Like I said, I'm not ready for the week to begin. If I never go to sleep again then it will stay Sunday forever, right? Fuck.
Ok, here we go...PROJECT RUNWAY SPOILER!!! If you have it on your Tivo and haven't watched it yet, quit reading....now.
Jeffrey!?!?!? Are you fucking kidding me!?!?!? What a joke. I just don't understand what the judges on Project Runway want. One day they want one thing, the next they want the other. It must be confusing for the contestants. Uli did everything they wanted of her. Michael did what they loved throughout the show. Laura excelled at construction, which they always loved. And Jeffrey did what they typically disliked throughout the show. But on this day, they wanted "art" and not wearable clothes. Thus, Jeffrey and his neck tattoo undeservingly won the whole thing.
Between Vincent and Angela sticking around so long, the otherwise gorgeous Heidi Klum's occasional unfortunate choices in wardrobe, it's limp to the finish and now this horrible ending, the show became a drain on my Wednesday nights and I am now forever done with Project Runway.
Yes, my team won again, although it was a little too close for comfort. If McNabb doesn't perform, my team has it's issues. Nothing much changed in the league this week. Culture Kills Lions continued their winning ways while Cuckoo For Kapgar posted the league's high score with 99 points to take over the league scoring lead. 2much411foozball and CineRobots battled to a 90 point tie. Their scores would have been good enough to beat any team in the league except Kapgar, that's some bad luck.
Here are the week five results. Leading scorers follow...
Witty Team Name (2-4) - 62 - Joe Horn - 17 points
Cuckoo For Kapgar (4-2) - 99 - Philip Rivers - 18 points
johnnyhongkong (2-4) - 43 - Roy Williams - 14 points
2much411foozball (3-2-1) - 90 - Torry Holt - 25 points
CineRobots - (2-3-1) - 90 - LaDanian Tomlinson - 30 points
navelgazing ramblers (2-4) - 42 - Reggie Brown - 18 points
Blogography Hellmonkeys (1-5) - 22 - Jason Elam - 9 points
TheDutchFiles (4-2) - 65 - Mark Bulger - 23 points
Red Zins (2-4) - 37 - Losman/Rackers - 12 points
Down With Pants! (6-0) - 60 - Donovan McNabb - 14 points
The OC Snackiepoos (2-4) - 47 - Laveranues Coles - 17 points
In week seven, TheDutchFiles has their first chance to knock off my undefeated squad. The game of the week pits second place Culture Kills Lions against a revamped johnnyhongkong team that is poised to make a run at a playoff spot despite his 2-4 start to the season.
2much411foozball vs. Red Zins
TheDutchFiles vs. Down With Pants!
The OC Snackiepoos vs. Blogography Hellmonkeys
Cuckoo For Kapgar vs. navelgazing ramblers
Culture Kills Lions vs. johnnyhongkong
CineRobots vs. Witty Team Name
Bye week teams: Chicago, Tennessee, St. Louis, New Orleans, San Francisco and Baltimore.
Brian Bosworth: LAX Airport - My first celebrity sighting came while standing in line at LAX. I was flying home to Seattle after a weekend of apartment hunting down here and he was standing in front of me in the Alaska Airlines check-in line talking very loudly and forcefully to someone about a real estate deal. It was a great thrill for a long-time Seattle Seahawks fan, even if he was a huge bust. I couldn't be happier that my first celebrity sighting was of the star of Stone Cold and One Tough Bastard.
David Spade: The Avalon Hollywood - David Spade is even shorter than you would ever imagine. We saw him chatting with some friends in the parking lot next to The Avalon Hollywood following a Dan Band show about a year ago. We weren't sure if he was leaving from the show or if he was just showing up for something else. Nonetheless, he was there, on the corner of Hollywood and Vine, a place that we read that we would never, ever see celebrities. It's too touristy.
Mike Farrell: Ca Del Sole Italian Restaurant - We went to this restaurant expecting laid back Italian food. Wrong. It was uppity and fancy, but the food was pretty darn good. Anyway, Mike Farrell of M*A*S*H came into the restaurant with a large group of people. I always loved M*A*S*H and Captain BJ Hunnicut so I recognized him immediately even without his mustache. After reading about all the liberal activism he has undertaken over the past 25 years, I am now an even bigger fan. And I like to think that he was as put off by the snootiness of the waitstaff as we were.
Wilson Cruz: Hollywood & Highland Center - I first spotted Wilson Cruz of My So Called Life and Tick...Tick...Boom! (an amazing play we saw him in earlier this year) fame while another fan was chatting him up late Saturday evening at Hollywood & Highland. I was impressed because he genuinely looked like he was happy to have a fan stop and talk to him. I got Death? all confused because I said that he played Angel in the movie Rent when, in fact, that's Wilson Jermaine Heredia. I always thought it was Cruz that played that part in the movie and when we saw Rent on Broadway. It's easy to understand my confusion, Cruz has played Angel before and both guys look very similar and they're both named Wilson. Oh well, I was still excited see Wilson Cruz. I told you you'd never guess.
If you have a moment, even if you don't like sports, please head on over there and check out the changes I made and let me know what you think. It's still a work in progress as I continue to find things I don't like or things that don't work and it would help if I had some other opinions. Thanks in advance and I promise some actual content over the next couple days.
Tune in tomorrow....We saw a celebrity in LA yesterday! I bet you can't guess who!
The contest is pretty simple. Post your Archie McPhee wishlist on your blog or MySpace page with links back to the products, then email the URL to firstname.lastname@example.org. Two people will win $200 worth of stuff on their wishlist and two others will win $100 worth of stuff.
So without further ado, here is the Down With Pants! family wishlist. Buy us crap!
- Bacon Wallet
- How To Keep Your Husband Apron
- Cap'n Danger Stunt Monkey
- The Cubes Corporate Zombies
- Horrified B-Movie Victims - (shown above)
- Glow Fairies
- Pirate Canvas Bag
- Lunch Lady Action Figure
- Commie Mustache & Beard Set
- Variety Meats Pencil Toppers
- Ninja Stickers
- Pirate Clock
- Ninja Devil Duckie
- Devil Duckie Bubble Bath
- Glow Maria
- Glow Our Lady of Guadalupe
- Red Mini Bowling Bag
- The Cubes Sensitivity Trainer
- Deluxe Jesus Action Figure
- Good vs. Evil Unicorn Play Set
- Cold War Unicorn Play Set
- Death on Drugs Playing Cards
- Death on Cigarettes Playing Cards
In other action, last week's only other one loss team, 2much411foozball, didn't put up much of a fight against Witty Team Name going down 49-35. In fact, much of the league didn't put up much of a fight, even the winners, as scoring hit an all time low.
Here are the week five results. Leading scorers follow...
Cuckoo For Kapgar (3-2) - 61 - Bears Defense - 17 points
Witty Team Name (2-3) - 49 - Greg Jennings - 11 points
2much411foozball (3-2) - 35 - Kitna/Holt - 8 points
TheDutchFiles (3-2) - 46 - Mark Bulger - 16 points
CineRobots - (2-3) - 29 - Antonio Gates - 8 points
johnnyhongkong (2-3) - 69 - Eagles Defense - 24 points
Blogography Hellmonkeys (1-4) - 41 - Peyton Manning - 13 points
The OC Snackiepoos (2-3) - 46 - Jaguars Defense - 26 points
Red Zins (2-3) - 20 - Brett Favre - 8 points
Down With Pants! (5-0) - 80 - Donovan McNabb - 23 points
navelgazing ramblers (1-4) - 60 - Robbie Gould - 19 points
The week six matchups are incredibly important. This week will separate the contenders from the pretenders. All of the teams at 2-3 face teams with better records. The OC Snackiepoos have the best opportunity to make a statement taking on my DWP! team. Too bad my squad will be at full strength while the Snackiepoos will be missing half of their players due to the bye week.
2much411foozball vs. CineRobots
TheDutchFiles vs. Red Zins
The OC Snackiepoos vs. Down With Pants!
Cuckoo For Kapgar vs. johnnyhongkong
Culture Kills Lions vs. Witty Team Name
Blogography Hellmonkeys vs. navelgazing ramblers
A bunch of teams are off this week. Cleveland, Green Bay, Indianapolis, Minnesota, New England and Jacksonville all have byes. So remember to set your lineups! It might take you ten minutes.
Not releasing scent quickly throughout the room is inexcusable. And where the shit is the lasting fragrance? Plus, blowing them out has become such a time consuming hassle, I can't even fathom how people have been putting up with it for all these years. It's all total bullshit, and I'm sick and tired of it and so is Glade.
We all need and deserve quick and long lasting fragrance. It is our dream, it is our calling, it is...our destiny.
Down With Pants? Fuck that. Down With Scented Candles!
With apologies to Greg, here are two albums that have dominated my CD player over the past week...
Totally different topic: We celebrated Oktoberfest tonight by chowing down on some Bavarian food from The Old Vienna (conveniently located only blocks from our house) and watching The Sound of Music. It's the first time I've seen The Sound of Music and I am so sorry to say that I started rooting for the Nazis at one point. Couldn't they have shown up two hours earlier and ended our suffering? That is one strange, mixed-up musical.
This Project Runway season went full bore for ten straight episodes but when we got down to four finalists, they took a week off and showed a season two marathon, then they showed an extremely boring episode where everybody's designs stunk and nobody got kicked off, this week they had a reunion, next week we get part one of the finals and finally, on October 18th, we learn who wins. At that point, I'll just be relieved that there aren't any more delays.
Tonight, Death? properly diagnosed Vincent. Seriously, no joke. This guy has Narcissistic Personality Disorder. Here are the diagnostic criteria according to Wikipedia (so take it for what it's worth), at least five of the following are necessary for a diagnosis:
- has a grandiose sense of self-importance
- is preoccupied with fantasies of unlimited success, power, brilliance, beauty, or ideal love
- believes that he or she is "special" and unique and can only be understood by other special people
- requires excessive admiration
- strong sense of entitlement
- takes advantage of others to achieve his or her own ends
- lacks empathy
- is often envious or believes others are envious of him or her
- arrogant affect
Did you see him tonight go off about his laundry and how he just laughed about it afterwards. He can't see how scary that was which is another big part of his disorder. And don't miss his tirade on the Bravo site about "blogspots". It's priceless.
UPDATE - Minutes after posting this I decided to do a little research and it turns out that many people have suggested that all of the contestants have this personality disorder. But, I think it is particularly true for Vincent. He exudes at least five of the criteria while the others have massive amounts of one or two and only show traces of the others.
I know I'm going to start hearing it this week. Down 12 points going into Monday Night Football, QB Donovan McNabb put the rest of my losers on his back and rallied my DWP! team to victory over johnnyhongkong to keep our unbeaten season alive. I got lucky this week. McNabb is the man!
In other action, Cuckoo For Kapgar continues to impress posting a league record 104 points behind QB Byron Leftwich while both Culture Kills Lions and 2much411foozball kept pace remaining only a game back of first place. The Red Zins posted their second straight victory after a horrendous start to the season and appear poised to make a run at the championship behind general manager RW's shrewd use of the free agent market.
Here are the week four results. As always, leading scorers for each team follow the score...
Cuckoo For Kapgar (3-1) - 104 - Byron Leftwich - 21 points
Witty Team Name (1-3) - 33 - Lamont Jordan - 12 points
2much411foozball (3-1) - 73 - Falcons Defense - 25 points
TheDutchFiles (2-2) - 67 - Mark Bulger - 26 points
Culture Kills Lions (3-1) - 57 - Drew Bledsoe - 13 points
Blogography Hellmonkeys (1-3) - 28 - Peyton Manning - 16 points
Red Zins (2-2) - 64 - Lawrence Maroney - 18 points
navelgazing ramblers (1-3) - 48 - Reggie Williams - 16 points
CineRobots - (2-2) - 53 - Thomas Jones - 16 points
The OC Snackiepoos (1-3) - 32 - Tom Brady - 14 points
Down With Pants! (4-0) - 58 - Donovan McNabb - 29 points
johnnyhongkong (1-3) - 50 - Jeff Wilkins - 18 points
Week five features a matchup between two second place teams as Cuckoo For Kapgar takes on Culture Kills Lions. CFK will be at full strength while CKL will be without five bye week players. The up and coming Red Zins take on the OC Snackiepoos while CineRobots and TheDutchFiles try to separate themselves from the middle of the pack.
2much411foozball vs. Witty Team Name
TheDutchFiles vs. CineRobots
The OC Snackiepoos vs. Red Zins
Cuckoo For Kapgar vs. Culture Kills Lions
Blogography Hellmonkeys vs. johnnyhongkong
Down With Pants! vs. navelgazing ramblers
Please, please, please notice that Atlanta, Cincinnati, Seattle and Houston are on their bye weeks. Not to name names, but a couple of you did not set your lineups this week and it had a major impact on the outcomes and the standings. Please stay active and make sure to get your players in. If you have a problem, please contact me so I can fix it for you.
My Blog List
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- Instead, We Watched Weeds
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- Careful, Man There's a Hipster Here
- I Want More Weekend
- My Life Spotting the D-List 2
- WARNING!!! - PROJECT RUNWAY SPOILER!!!
- DWP! Fantasy Football - Week Six
- My Life Spotting the D-List
- The Sports Logo Pundit Site Redesign
- Shameless Commerce - Archie McPhee Wishlist Contes...
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- DWP! Fantasy Football - Week Five
- Down With Scented Candles!
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